Boyfriend’s 39th Birthday

Early Beginnings

I did my best to make my boyfriend’s birthday extra special this year because I couldn’t even remember what we did for his birthday last year. Turns out, we went to one of his favorite restaurants, House of Prime Rib with a group of our friends. This year, we got a little more activity going. First things first, I woke my butt up to move my car for street cleaning at 8 am. Then, since I was already awake and excited about his birthday, I went to the grocery store to get supplies for breakfast. And I mean breakfast! I made him what I believe was a full Irish breakfast, baked beans, eggs, bangers, bacon, Irish soda bread, orange juice and of course, Barry’s tea. I even baked a little cake, but it looked somewhat pathetic to me. I realized whilst whipping up the batter that I didn’t actually have anything to bake it in. and yes, we did just move in, but I swear that I used to have baking supplies of all sorts. Of course, I could be making that up in my mind.

While I cooked the things that needed less attention, I hung the Star Wars themed banner that still has yet to be taken down; I cleaned a little bit around the house and took out a lot of trash and recyclables. Needless to say, I was slightly relieved that he slept until noon because I didn’t realize how much I’d wanted to do. I had to lock the cat out of our bedroom to try to assure he could sleep as well as possible. She likes to get rowdy when she thinks the hoo-mans need to wake up and pay attention to her. When he finally got out of bed, I was so surprised that I spilled coffee grounds all over the kitchen floor!

He was slightly astonished when he saw the spread I made for him, but didn’t get the full effect until he put his contacts in, as he’s very blind. When he realized the banner was Star Wars themed, he got even more excited, knowing that this breakfast was a good way to start his birthday, even though he had claimed he didn’t want to make a big deal out of the occasion. I’ll skip the details of the card I gave him, but it was slightly sappy and also funny.

Skip a few hours of getting ready for the next part of the birthday celebrations.

We went to his favorite restaurant in the city, if not the world for a pre-Giant’s game dinner. Now this was only the second time I’d ever been to Kokkari Estatorio, but I had already decided that it was “no longer his favorite restaurant…it’s OUR favorite restaurant,” the first time he took me a few months ago. So I was flabbergasted that I was able to make the reservation only two weeks ahead of time and decided to snap up the time slot. We had an amazing meal, which I’ll describe at another time. We had the best server in the building; I’m sure of it. He was sassy, fun and decided for some reason that he liked me too! And even though we ordered no dessert, he brought us a free chocolate cake for d’s birthday. I thought that was very sweet, especially since at my restaurant we don’t have a complimentary birthday dessert

Let’s Go Giants!

Let’s fast forward to being at the Giant-Dodgers baseball game: it was over quickly, but the one highlight was the event of the foul ball that came our way. I was sitting on the boyfriend’s lap for a second, when all of a sudden, he practically pushes me off to try to reach for this random object flying toward us. I’m somewhat bad at watching sports when he distracts me by being super cute, so it definitely didn’t process that there was a foul ball coming toward us until it was over our heads. He claims that he could’ve caught it. Luckily, he loves me a little bit more than catching a foul ball. But he also has a story about how he dropped a full beer that he’d just bought to catch a ball, now that stories have been combined, he’s told people the last few days that he didn’t want to be the person who dropped his girlfriend to catch one. However, in my attempt to get out of the way of his efforts, I landed with my ass on one of the armrests and I now have a huge bruise in the middle of my butt cheek. And it’s painful…

The Next Day

The best part about all of this was when he told people we saw the next day that it was his best birthday since he was five years old, went to the Irish premiere of Return of the Jedi, and sat next to the actors who portrayed R2D2 and C3PO. (Did I mention he’s a huge Star Wars fan?) I feel like that’s impossible, there have to have been even more awesome birthday celebrations in those 34 years, but I’ll take the credit! I did do my utmost to make it a special one. Now I just have to start planning next years’ birthday now to be able to exceed expectations. What would you want to do if you were turning 40?

Do you know the Muffin Man?

I couldn’t think of a title for this post because I haven’t written it yet. But like they say, ya gotta start somewhere. Just get to writing and it will eventually flow…I hope. Quick shout out to the only two people who consistently read my blog posts: my Mom and Grandma Sandy! If you are also a reader, leave a comment so I know you’re real. Thanks!

As some of you know, I’m now a redhead. It’s a big change from the blonde look that has been my go-to for a couple of years now. It is not easy to put color back into your hair when it’s been bleached to hell. Juuuuust saying. my hair looks very much like an apricot right now. while i am definitely ok with it, it was not my desired result. I was going for something a little closer to Isla Fisher than a fun, unnatural pink-peach-red color…But like I said, it’s a challenge to go from very dark hair that has been bleached to a very light blonde and then put a red over it and not get a pink-toned outcome. I knew this from the start, but I’m willing to play around until I get to my intended hair color. I’m going to change topics without a segue because this one isn’t thaaaaaaaat interesting, even to me.

I’m really excited about a new development at my job: I’m going to be trained as a server! I’m not sure how official this is, as my manager loves to just come up with ideas and surprise me with them. Like when he gave me a raise to do office work in addition to hosting. I think it’s awesome that he trusts me to do things, but I don’t really care much for being thrown new tasks as if I know what I’m doing. I NEVER know what I’m doing. I only know I can learn to do anything because I’m a student at heart. Always observing and trying to learn. Anyway, I’m planning to take advantage of this new bone my boss is throwing me and I’m gonna make my way to assistant manager as soon as possible. I want to be trusted to and useful. I want Black Cat to be the sleek-est, sexiest, Michael-Bauer-can-suck-it-because-we-ARE-amazing restaurant, ever!

Hopefully, being trained as a server will also make me rich, haha. Or at least help me pay off my student loans, which being a cook never did…I also really like the idea of taking care of people, which I can do as a host, but not as much as being a server. It’s more direct during dinner service. Kind of as if I get to spoil my friends and take care of them all night and show them a great time, except, I don’t know them and I’m getting paid to take care of them. Hopefully, the kitchen will go easy on me while I learn the seat numbers all over again, and learn the ins and outs of serving. I know it’s not really that hard, as long as I don’t get lazy and comfortable. I think that really is the difference in most aspects of life. Things are usually easy to do, but becoming too comfortable  is always your downfall.

Brand New Apartment, Brand New Life

New Apartment

This is a big step, for me, for him, for us. It’s extremely cliché; I know it. We signed a lease together and I’m going to write this post even though he’ll probably be embarrassed. However, since many of you out there don’t know who HE is, he can relax, knowing that the ones who do know won’t make fun of him for too long.
My man and I lived together for a few months out of necessity and, I’d have to wager, a bit of laziness on his part. Or, maybe it was his sneaky way of a test drive. Whatever it was, living together at my last place of abode led to us signing our first lease together about one month prior to this post. We’ve been officially moved-in together for about three weeks; I think it’s going well! We even had our first houseguests over, including one of our favorite couples ever over for a hilarious evening of food and wine. I made boeuf bourguignon a la Julia Child (because I can’t resist making a mention of her wonderful legacy) and he made the most wonderful salad. Of course, the walnuts were raw, yet still scrumptious because, as we discovered in media res, our oven wouldn’t heat up…

New Life

In other news, I’ve gotten what one can only call a promotion of sorts. It’s funny how getting a raise and promotion only means new (and more) work. At least that’s what I’ve observed in the movies! Ha! I’ve just gotten my first one of either sort. Although, I’m not sure if I can really say promotion, but my hours of work and play have dramatically changed and, as of this payday, so will the number of dollars in my direct deposit.

Looking Backward, Just for a moment

It’s amazing to think that it was three years ago to the day, I was fired from my first job in the city, for, essentially, not being trained properly. I still believe there were more motives than that at play, but who cares at this point? The only reason I even know that it happened is that I have a draft labeled March 22, 2014: “Being fired and moving on…Yes, I was just fired from my job yesterday.”

I’m not sure I even want to open the draft to read the rest…I can’t believe how different my life is now. I can’t believe that back then I could even begin to fathom that I was happy. I was not nearly as happy as I am now……

Took the time to read that draft. I’m amazed at how positive I was about being fired from a job I loved so much…Of course, that’s how my momma raised me!

unenthusiastic​ right now

Someone give me a push

I have a couple of jobs on the table right now, none of which I’m ecstatic about, but all of which would present me with different opportunities. Two would mainly be helping friends in need of pastry cooks, and the other would be good money while I continue the journey to becoming a restaurant marketing person: a professional who doesn’t have to wear a uniform or non-slips. not that I loathe my uniform or non-slip shoes, but I’m ready for something different, although I have one business opportunity in mind that would combine my favorite people and my favorite place. However, I’m not sold on that idea myself, nor would anyone else involved be interested if I’m not ready to pitch the idea. I’m most interested in being a front of house restaurant employee right now because that would enable me to go to classes and still make more money than I do on unemployment. In addition, I wouldn’t be nearly as bored as I frequently complain that I am.

push harder, please

I have a laundry list of things I wanted to do these past three months and that I never managed to get my ass in gear to do, even though I had no excuses whatsoever. I hate that about myself. I need outside motivation/impetus to get shit done, and I guess that being unemployed is just manifesting my laziest qualities. I’m not even sure why I haven’t done any of the things I’d been so excited about before Aziza closed. It makes little to no sense not to do things you were excited about. I used to be super excited to go to karaoke and then almost skive off at the last minute. Mostly, I’m enamored enough with karaoke that I usually go when I can, when I have the energy.

 

I’ve Set a Goal, Made a Plan

For the first time in a long time

I’ve set a goal! In my opinion, goals are difficult, but this one shouldn’t be too bad. I just decided, whilst perusing Pinterest, that I want to have a job by Halloween. This gives me a deadline for my goal, which makes it a plan.
I know I can do this simple goal. I’ve figured out, for the most part what I want to do, and I can do anything I set my mind to doing. I just have to find someone to hold me accountable. It’s always easier to stick with something–if you really want it–when you have a friend to remind you of your goal. All I really need, however, is to remember that unemployment funds don’t last forever and I’m halfway to six months.
I know this was a short post, but I’m tired as it’s far past my bedtime (I read Harry Potter and the Cursed Child tonight). Did anyone else read it yet?

Dogs Surround Me

All the Dogs!

I think I’m only writing for practice. Practicing my HTML skills. I’m still pretty far behind the curve on this one, but it’s not that difficult, just memorizing what to use, when/why, and how: same as every other thing in life. Apparently learning to code is important for everyone, now that our world runs on the internet, computers and smart devices (phones, tablets, etc.).

When I did my internship with KeyReads, they gave me a few PowerPoint slides on SEO and HTML but I fell off using them because I finished my internship and ultimately dropped out of Graduate School, which was a mistake, to go into cooking, which wasn’t a mistake. I don’t know what my life would have been like if I stayed in my master’s program and maybe tried to cook part-time. It got me to where I am today, regardless. I have good friends and live in a place I love because I attended 1/2 of the program to which I applied.

P.S. are you still wondering why I mentioned dogs?

I only mentioned the dogs because I really am surrounded by dogs. My mom’s business is called P.E.T. Your Dog. She does pet sits, CPR/first aid training, and doggie day care, as well as overnight boarding. So, there are always dogs at her house, which my mom’s cat isn’t too happy about. Now that my mom’s business is well established, she can be more selective when it comes to taking clients. Sometimes the cat can hang out with the dogs, not too often, but it happens occasionally.

Ultimately the fact is

If you read my comments on this blog, you see her perennially saying she’s proud of me. I’m proud of her too.

As I Sit Here, Wishing to be Weird

As I sit here, completely uninspired and desiring to be, I watch other people. I always have watched other people; I watch them, wondering if they’re inspired or even happy. I’m not happy. I’m sitting here writing what feels like prose poetry, forgetting the definition I learned in school, catching every spelling mistake and getting frustrated because I hate prose poetry. Why can’t we keep the two separate?

And I realize that I need to cut my fingernails because it is no longer satisfying, but annoying to have them hit the keys on my keyboard. Maybe if my nails were stronger, but they don’t feel strong. I don’t feel strong. I’ve been sick for the last week, and I still feel exhausted. The coffee and bagel aren’t helping my energy levels…

2016-07-10 2016-07-10 001 003

I am still sitting here writing whatever this is. Whatever this is that is completely inspired by my utter lack of inspiration. My desperation nags at me. I don’t want to be writing right now. I want to read, reread The HobbitPride and Prejudice (no zombies please). I want to do something where it’s considered acceptable to do nothing but read all day, the same books I’ve read a thousand times, if I so choose. I always talked about going to culinary school while I was a cook. Well, maybe I am still a cook, but not right now, right now I’m funemployed, as I’ve called it… My little joke, euphemism for not having a job because my old employer lost interest in us.

And I remember how fun it is to have my hair “weird” colors. I miss pink and purple and I long to try “opal” and I can’t because I worry that I may actually get an in-person interview with a company who doesn’t want to hire people with “weird” hair. At least I grew out my faux hawk. Not to mention, this is San Francisco, the mecca of weird hair, weird people. WEIRDNESS. I long to be more weird, but it’s expensive to be weird. Tattoos, hair dye, piercings, unless you have awesome weird friends with talents they’re willing to freely give away. The services required to look “weird” are not cheap. Unless you wanted to look cheap as part of your weird. I don’t know. I want my hair to look artistic and cared for, not just weird.

I am still sitting here and I’m glad, knowing that my goal of forcing myself to write something down would make me write anything and would also literally make me feel better. I do. With my “normal” blonde hair, or maybe it’s bland, I don’t think so, yet. My shirt that says “but first, coffee.” Another attempt at normal I guess. If I stopped being so normal, I would be more brave. I miss being weird. When I first moved here, to San Francisco, I was more weird. I had more “muchness” to me. But I’ve been scared and become lazy too; I think that’s the problem.

I don’t know where to go to become inspired. I want people to call me to hang out and they don’t. I don’t know where to go. I want someone to guide me a little. Help me become weird again. Instead I sit in the cafe, drinking coffee. Pretending to be normal. Wishing I could play guitar. Maybe in an alternate life I learned to play and became a busker. Maybe that’s in the future.